Survivors of childhood trauma often struggle with the confusion stemming from a lack of boundaries and respect for their bodies, which is a significant challenge to overcome. Added to this there probably was an environment that lacked emotional intelligence and healthy supportive and loving conversations. These survivors usually grew up feeling devastatingly alone, even insignificant. […]
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Creating and maintaining websites since 2002...ish.
Double Standards and Subtle Narcissism – June 18 2025
Have you ever felt the sting of a double standard — where someone expects grace, understanding, or respect from you, but offers little of it in return? Double standards don’t build connection — they create confusion, resentment, and distance. They often show up in subtle, relational ways that are hard to name but deeply felt. […]
Scapegoat Blessings – March 10 2025
After six plus years of trauma recovery more realizations are forthcoming. 🙂 For many years, I carried the deep pain of being distanced from my family of origin after disclosing the sexual abuse I suffered at the hands of one of my brothers. The rejection I felt was profound, and I grieved not only the […]
Illusions in Trauma Recovery – November 6, 2024
This image holds a powerful reminder of how our perceptions can be misleading. It’s a photo of rocks that, from a particular angle, appear as a person quietly sitting in water, reading a book. The visual illusion mirrors the inner landscape of trauma recovery: assumptions about appearances can lead to profound misunderstandings. When I […]
DISCREDIT – September 9, 2024
Discrediting a person is a common behaviour from someone who feels afraid, shameful, or jealous. Sometimes it comes from sheer ignorance. To those who receive the misjudgment (discrediting) know what is being said is not true and trust that eventually the truth will come out and if the accused is innocent, they’ll be exonerated. Childhood […]
Moving On. Aug 7 2024
Those who lack empathy don’t like it when what they’ve done is brought up again and again, while you work through the trauma they caused. They expect you to move on. Even IF they apologized they expect you to move on. They often get impatient and even angry if you continue to have feelings about […]
I Feel Sorry. July 30 2024
I feel sorry for those who don’t understand the impact of interpersonal trauma, which is what childhood trauma is. Doing the hard work at figuring out what has been underneath my health and social challenges has made a big difference in my life. In the past I’ve felt frustrated and hurt that certain people didn’t […]
Sharing. June 10 2024
Six years ago I began the hardest season of my life — of working through my childhood trauma. In the early stages of the trauma healing process I learned what I could about the impact of various abuses so that I understood the nuances of victimhood that overpowered my life. I shared things as I […]
Punishment or Discipline? January 1, 2024
The environment I grew up in didn’t feel warm and loving. It seemed that more energy was put into punishing a mistake than teaching how to do things better or think through a problem to make wise decisions. I thought that punishment was discipline, but, this is an untruth. Discipline involves teaching, educating, explaining, and […]
Post Abuse Grooming Dec 6, 2023
If we consider ourselves amongst those who empathize, respect and dignify others, we interact with others with an underlying assumption that those we cross paths with are the same way. We project our own goodness onto others, assuming they’re like us. In time we learn that nothing could be further from the truth. There are […]